Each of these characteristics are super important if you want to have a healthy mother-daughter relationship. But as key as those serious advice-giving exchanges or tearful late-night chats can be to bonding, like any relationship, a strong mother-daughter relationship also has spontaneity and excitement. In other words: have fun!
There’s something special that happens in the heart of a daughter when her mom takes time out of her busy schedule to have a fun-filled day with her, just because she can. And there’s something special that happens in the heart of a mother when she is able to hear her daughter’s laughter and feel that joy of knowing that she is loved by her daughter.
So yes. Communicate effectively. Listen patiently. Show compassion. But have some fun too! Go out and strengthen your mother-daughter relationship by enjoying your time with each other! And just in case you’re having Mom Brain (which is a totally legitimate condition) and you can’t think of any ideas, here are four epic date ideas to help you build your mother-daughter relationship!
1. A Shopping Date
Okay. So confession: The stereotypes are true. Women love shopping. What a surprise! This isn’t always true. Only one of my daughter’s loves shopping as much as I do. (Unless I’m paying, at which point the other one suddenly becomes interested. Funny how that works, right?)
Seriously though. I cannot tell you the number of times that I have walked into a shopping mall fully intending to finish my Christmas shopping—good intentions, right?!—and left with bags and bags and bags of clothing items and make up products and all manner of exciting paraphernalia plunder… but not one gift. Nothing. Nada. Zero. Zilch.
We’ve all been there. (I know you’re out there! I can’t be the only one, right?). For many of use, shopping comes naturally. We were basically born shopping. So here’s my question: Why not bring your daughter along? I know, I know. You’ll have to deal with the inevitable onslaught of “Oh oh oh, hey Mom, can we buy that?! And by “we” I mean “you”. Obviously! insert sweet smile of innocence here”.
But honestly? I’ve had some super fun moments with my daughter when we’ve gone shopping together. Most recently, I brought my eldest daughter Christmas shopping with me. And it was a blast! She’s super organized, so she kept me on track. She loves Christmas, and she has so much energy, so she brought just a ridiculous amount of joy and excitement to the whole day! We bought some gifts, grabbed some chocolate, had some Indian food for dinner. It was amazing!
So go try it out! Trust me: if your daughters are anything like mine, nothing will excite them more than a shopping date with you! But if your daughters aren’t into shopping and prefer something a bit more natural, don’t worry. I got your back. Idea number two is for you!
2. A Berry-Picking Date
Wait! Before you chuckle and keep scrolling—because really, who wants to go berry-picking? You would be shocked how much fun this is! Firstly, you get to eat a lot of berries, which for my daughters is literally a dream come true. My daughter once shouted “Give me back my toast” in the middle of the night because she was dreaming that her sister stole her toast. If she’s that excited about some bread and butter, you better believe that raspberries and blueberries and blackberries and strawberries speak to her heart in a unique way!
When my kids were younger and I was still homeschooling, I used to take them berry-picking regularly. There was this one time when, after what seemed like hours and hours of toiling, I still had hardly anything in my bucket. It was one of those moments of utter dejection when you start thinking: “Wow. This is sad. If I can’t do this right, how am I going to be a good parent?” Well, as I was sitting there, starting to tear up, my daughter walked up to me with a big smile of pride on her face and a big bucket of strawberries in her tiny little hands.
Now, I don’t know if it was the heat or just that time of the month, but I was so emotional because it was one of those beautiful moments that you only ever see in the movies. You know the ones: where the stressed out mom and the angst-y teenage daughter share a beautiful moment and make up after a big fight and there’s a single tear rolling down their cheeks (and like, a billion tears streaming down yours), and you just think, “Gosh. I wish I could have that moment.”
Well I’m here to tell you that you can!
But honestly: if you like nature and enjoying the warm summer sun, take your daughter berry picking. You can eat lots of berries (and throw some berries too…) and take selfies together when you have juice all over your face (which make for awesome blackmail in the future… just saying). As long as you have the right attitude and a heck of a lot of sunscreen, it’ll be amazing!
3. A Hair-Do Date
So both my daughters have lots of hair. And I mean lots of hair. I think my eldest daughter has about three feet of hair by now, and my youngest daughter isn’t too far behind. (Now you know what I married a plumber. Yeesh!)
Now, only the youngest one is super into the whole manicure-pedicure scene. My younger daughter spends at least an hour doing her make-up every morning. My older daughter spends maybe 3 minutes (on a good day) putting on just mascara, leaves it on for the next few days, and then waits for it to sort of just flake off before she’ll actually washes her face and reapplies it after a shower. However, while she doesn’t value doing her make-up and nails, you better believe that she values getting her hair done. The problem is that, with three feet of super thick hair, it gets pricey. So every once in a while, I take her to get her hair done.
Now, it’s been a while since we’ve been able to do that, mostly because she goes to university five hours away from home. But those are memories that she still has, times that she spent together. And they were super fun! I for one absolutely love getting my hair done! And I bet you do too! So why not invite your daughter along for the ride? Nothing says mother-daughter relationship like some quality time at a hair salon! (Okay, well actually, I can think of a few other things that say mother-daughter relationship better than that… but you get what I mean!)
4. A High Tea Date
When my daughters were about 7 years old and 10 years old, I brought them both to the King Edward Hotel in downtown Toronto for high tea. Now, for those who have never had high tea, what happens is you get all dressed up (at least, if you’re like me) and you go to this hotel, where you are given a selection of teas to choose from, as well as a tiered platter of finger sandwiches, scones, and all manner of other delicacies. You also get jams and Devonshire cream (which, for the record, if so amazingly delicious that it’s worth paying the money to have high tea just for the Devonshire cream).
Now, when I took my two girls, they were both young, so it wasn’t quite the glamorous experience I thought it would be. (Translation: they picked through the sandwiches, complained about the mayo, didn’t drink half the tea—you get the picture). However! I know that, now that they’re both a bit older, I know that my daughters would absolutely appreciate and love the experience.
Having high tea really makes you feel like royalty. And, regardless of their imperfections, that’s how I want my daughters to feel. Like they are valuable, like they are special, like they are worthy to be treated like the princesses that they are. So if you’ve never had high tea, I would highly suggest going (pun intended)! It is such a beautiful bonding experience, and it can really remove tension by speaking life, love, and value back into your mother-daughter relationship.
So there you have it: four epic date ideas to strengthen your mother-daughter relationship. Now it’s your turn.
It’s hard being a mom, and sometimes I can barely come up with an idea for dinner, never mind an idea for a date night with my daughters. So let’s help each other out and get this conversation going!
What date ideas do you have? What have you always wanted to do with your mother or your daughter?
To add your brilliance and two cents, comment below!